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| "He" was a tough character! |
This morning I spotted this character standing all by himself by the edge of the pool. I was pretty sure he wasn’t an owner or renter, nor for that matter, was he a guest. I was also pretty sure that he hadn’t taken a shower before entering the area as required by condo rules. Stepping out on the balcony, I affixed the trespasser with my best “indignant owner” stare, and said “excuse me sir, but what unit are staying in?” The trespasser didn’t answer but instead looked back at me with one beady eye that seemed to say, “I’m here looking at your swimming pool. You got a problem with that?”
After exchanging stares with this unpleasant creature for a minute or two, I decided to wait him out and see what he would do next. I didn’t have to wait long. Just as I settled down with my morning coffee and paper I heard a splash and when I looked out the window, he was swimming in our pool! Not only was he swimming, he was doing laps, back and forth from one end of the pool to the other; all the time paying no attention to me. Talk about nerve! Finally he hopped out of the pool and began drying himself off; taking his own sweet time in the process. That’s when it dawned on me that he hadn’t come here to swim at all; he had come to take a bath. That did it! No more Mister Nice Guy!
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| It was all about bathing---nothing else. |
Pulling out my trusty cell phone, I called the Gulf Stream police, using the number that was conveniently programmed as a quick dial number. The dispatcher was sympathetic, but claimed that the whole matter was not in their jurisdiction. He did, however, give me the name and number of a Fish and Wildlife Service Officer who “would be more than happy to assist me.” “Call him now,” the dispatcher said. But it’s only seven am, I protested. Something about that proposition didn't seem right to me, but I decided to call anyway. All I got was an answering machine and he never called me back. Meanwhile, the trespasser was long gone.
The next morning our unwelcome visitor returned promptly at eight and stood by the edge of the pool waiting for a neighbor to finish swimming laps. When the neighbor departed he jumped in the pool and repeated yesterday's performance of swimming from one end to another. "He's back," I told my wife Maja, "and up to his old tricks." "It's not a he," Maja said, "it's a she." "Really? How do you know that?" Maja shrugged. "I just know," she said in a voice that suggested that future queries on the subject would be futile. Ten minutes later, she was in her bathing suit, ready for her morning swim. While you are downstairs, why don't you tell your "girl friend" she is trespassing?" I said. She nodded, but said nothing.
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| The moment of truth. Which one will blink? |
From my chair on the balcony I had a ringside seat for the drama that unfolded next. Maja slid into the pool while the trespasser eyed her suspiciously. Slowly, the two began to circle each other, looking for all the world like two female lions marking their territory on the Serengeti Plains in Africa. As the circling continued, Maja slowly advanced to the center of the pool, causing the trespasser to retreat. Finally, the trespasser was crowded into a corner with Maja just ten feet away. It was the moment of truth. As the two of them glared at each other, I could see Maja's mouth moving; but could not hear what she was saying. Suddenly, with a splash of water and a fluttering of wings, the trespasser was gone. Just like that!
What did you say to her anyway?" I asked when Maja returned. "Oh, just girls talk," she said, smiling mysteriously. "I don't think she will be bothering us any more," she added.
I sat for a moment or two digesting this information. Thank God for women, I decided. They always know what to do!
